


Ask senpai

by Celeporn



Category: Free!
Genre: Attempt at Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-10
Updated: 2015-07-10
Packaged: 2018-04-08 14:05:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4307958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Celeporn/pseuds/Celeporn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sousuke had never wanted to be some precious trusted senpai and shit like that, so it was really unreasonable that he had to deal with this situation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ask senpai

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language and I'm too lazy to find a beta :p

“Y-Yamazaki-senpai! Is Rin-senpai there?”

“No.”

Yamazaki slammed the door shut. Damn. Ai knocked again.

“Do you know when he comes back?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?!”

But before Ai had even finished that one-word sentence, the door was closed again. Damn. Shit. Now he had disturbed a senpai twice and _still_ the problem wasn’t solved.

Ai didn’t dare to try anymore. Now he would have to send Momo.

That sounded about worst idea ever.

 

*

 

“Yamazaki-senpai! Can I borrow a condom?”

“Borrow? A condom?”

“Yep.”

“Wait a sec.”

Momo didn’t quite understand how Ai had messed up on such an easy task — all you had to do was to knock on the door and state your business, and in the next moment Yamazaki was already throwing a little foil packet at him.

“And don’t you dare to return it afterwards,” Yamazaki grunted before closing the door.

Momo left feeling like a winner...

... and returned fifteen minutes later. Even though he knew for sure that Yamazaki was actually really kind and nice guy, at the moment he felt like the scariest person in the whole world. Momo braced himself and knocked, praying he would live through this.

When Yamazaki opened the door, Momo didn’t even look at him — hell no, he just bowed down as deep as he could.

“Yamazaki-senpai! Can I borrow another condom, please?”

“What the fuck did you do to the first one?”

“I unrolled it.”

“...”

“How could I have known that that’s the wrong way to do it? Clothes also have to be unfolded before putting them on!”

“Okay, I’ll give you another one. Call Rin and ask him what to do with it.”

“We tried that already! He told to ask you and hung up.”

Yamazaki facepalmed and took a deep breath.

“Come inside,” he said finally. When Momo closed the door, Yamazaki was already holding new foil packet in his hand.

“So, you hold the tip of the condom and roll it down on you. Get it? You don’t open it first, you roll it _straight on_.”

“Aha! Yeah, I get it! Rin-senpai has explained it to Ai some time ago, but that sounded really complicated and —”

“Don’t tell me anymore. I trust you have lube.”

“Have... what?”

“Lube. _Personal lubricant_.”

“... no. What for?”

“Try first without it and you’ll know,” Yamazaki answered and tossed him a little blue bottle. “Seriously, how on earth did you idiots get even to this point if you don’t know the basic stuff?”

Well, Momo had tried to do his research; had tried really hard and many times. Somehow he just had always ended watching porn instead of reading cold hard facts, and even he had brains enough to acknowledge that adult entertainment wasn’t very educational. Despite all awesome ideas he got, practically he knew nothing.

But the failed studies didn’t keep things from ‘just happening’, so here he was.

“Actually I don’t want to know. Forget I asked. Have a nice evening and such.”

“Mmm... Yamazaki-senpai?”

“What?”

“I was just thinking, that... that now that we’re talking about it, is there something else basic stuff I should know?”

“This cannot be happening”, Yamazaki sighed quietly, rubbing his face in a frustrated manner, but eventually he grabbed Momo’s shoulder and looked him straight in the eye. “Right, here’s the thing in a nutshell; you don’t even think about fucking without the condom on, use shitloads of lube, and you don’t just forcefully ram it in. First you do it with fingers, use one and then two and then three, and you proceed further only when the person, who bottoms, is ready.”

“How do you know that he’s ready?”

“You can fucking ask him,” Yamazaki practically snarled. Then after a short moment of complete silence, he added in softer tone; “Or if the other person is really, _really_ polite, or very... you know... sensual... he might tell you without asking. Things like that should be appreciated. And keep in mind that sex is not just putting it in.”

“Can you give examples?”

“...”

“Come on, man! Tell me something!”

“Get out and try to figure it out yourself.”

“Hey, it’s not fair to just mention something and then —”

“Listen, I have better things to do than give some goddamn sex-ed to you dolts.”

Instinctively Momo glanced around him but nothing exciting was to be seen, even the laptop on the table was shut. Yamazaki didn’t look like he was going anywhere, his hair was actually kind of a mess and he was dressed only in sweat pants and a t-shirt. Which, by the way, just might be inside out.

“Like what?”

“...”

“You’re right, that’s none of my business,” Momo agreed nervously and started to back off towards the door. Experimenting with Ai had to be a million times better way to find things out than going on with this query. “Thanks again for the condoms and good tips, you’re really so much better senpai than Rin. Though please, don’t say that to him!”

“If you’re not out in three seconds, we’ll give him a call and you can tell that yourself.”

“Okay, okay! Sorry! And thank you!”

 

*

 

Sousuke waited ‘til he heard the sound of his kouhais' door closing before exhaling in relief. A warm chuckle emanated from top bunk as Makoto dig his way out of the blankets.

“Don’t say anything,” Sousuke tried and squeezed his eyes shut.

“Aww senpai, how cute.”

“Only if you consider a great resemblance to a car crash ‘cute’.”

“You’re wrong, it was adorable,” Makoto insisted and came down. Sousuke knew even without looking that Makoto wasn’t wearing anything. “Or maybe I’m just glad to know that I’m in safe hands.”

Sousuke snorted. Makoto nestled himself against Sousuke’s back and started to nibble his earlobe first with his lips, then with his teeth. Gentle hands slid across Sousuke’s chest and down his stomach, all the way to his hips and thighs, and taking the clothes off again seemed like a good plan of action. Hopefully he wouldn’t have to get dressed anymore that night.

“No one has ever before said that I’m sensual.”

“Yeah, well, that no one is a blind idiot.”

Makoto’s hands slithered under Sousuke’s shirt and his mouth curved into a satisfied smirk against Sousuke’s neck.

“Tell me more”, he whispered, and Sousuke turned around to press Makoto against the wall.

‘Cause really — why only _tell_ when you could also _show_?

When Momo had showed up at the door, Sousuke had cursed Rin in his mind; why the hell did that moron teach these kids to rely so much on senpai’s help if he didn’t have the guts to answer their stupid questions any time, any place? Sousuke had never wanted these responsibilites — to be some precious trusted senpai and shit like that — so it was really unreasonable that he had to deal with this situation. The mess wasn’t his fault, so why the hell did he have to clean it up?

However, now that Makoto was moaning softly in his ear and guiding his hands all over that firm, warm, gorgeous body, Sousuke thought that maybe this state of affairs wasn’t all that bad. Hell, if turning Makoto on was that easy, Sousuke could even get used to advicing those two dorks.

 


End file.
